The Most Sexist Jewish Birth Announcements

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein, of the Silberscheiner sect of Hassidim from Silberschein, Poland, is recorded as publishing the following birth announcements in the Silberscheiner Gazette:

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his wife Gittel are pleased to announce the birth of their first child, a daughter, Hodel Zissl, on March 3, 1891.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his wife Gittel announce the birth of their second daughter, Sheindl Reizl, a sister for Hodel Zissl, born June 15, 1892.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his wife Gittel acknowledge the birth of their third daughter, Tzippa Nechama, a sister for Hodel Zissl and Sheindl Reizl, born May 26, 1893.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his wife Gittel find it necessary to inform their friends that they have a fourth daughter, Tirzah Yocheved, another sister for Hodel Zissl, Sheindl Reizl, and Tzippa Nechama, born August 1, 1894.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his new wife Hadassah have to announce the birth of their first child, a daughter, Devorah Malka, a half-sister for Hodel Zissl, Sheindl Reizl, Tzippa Nechama, and Tirzah Yocheved; January 20, 1898.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his wife Hadassah are crushed to report the birth of their second daughter, Rivka Zipporah, a sister for Devorah Malka, and another half-sister for Hodel Zissl, Sheindl Reizl, Tzippa Nechama, and Tirzah Yocheved; December 8, 1901.

Rabbi Chaim Silberschein and his new wife Batsheva are devastated to announce the birth of their first child, Dinah Simma, and a half-sister for Rivka Zipporah, Devorah Malka, Hodel Zissl, Sheindl Reizl, Tzippa Nechama, and Tirzah Yocheved; February 27, 1905.

On the third day of Hanukkah, 1905, the revered Rabbi Silberschein either fell, or threw himself, under the baby carriage of his youngest daughter, and was tragically killed.

The Hassidim became a major part of modern Judaism in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries. Most people know little about these deeply religious, passionate members of the Jewish world beyond Fiddler on the Roof, some short stories of I. B. Singer, and their music -- joyous,exciting melodies and words celebrating God, life, and the world.

It is with great pleasure that this book presents, for the first time in print, some of the best-loved lyrics of Hassidic songs.

YA BA BA BA, YA BA BA BA, YA BA BA BA BA BA BA BA BAA YABABABA, YABABABA, YABABABABABABABAB (The above is repeated two dozen times, interspersed with the following chorus.)

Chorus: YA BABABABABABABABABABABABABA, YA
BABABABABABABABABA
YA BABABABABABABABABABABABABA,
YA BABABABABABABABABA

LAI DE DIE, LAI DE DIE, LAI DE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIEEEEE.
LAI DE DIE, LAI DE DIE, LAI DE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIEEEEE.
(These verses are repeated until the arrival of the Messiah, or the onset of exhaustion, whichever comes first.)

OY BOY OY BOY OY BOY BOY BOY BOY BOY BOYYYYYYYY
OY BOY OY BOY OY BOY BOY BOY BOY BOY BOYYYYYYYYYYYY!! (HEY!!)

BIM, BAM, BIM BAM, BIM BAM, BIMBAMBIMBAMBIMBAMBIMBAMBIM-
BAMMMMMMM!
(Repeat, sing again, echo, and continue until dawn.)

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA - OYOYOYOYOYOYOYYYYYOOOOOOY!
LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA - OYOYOYOYOYOYO OOOOOOY!!
(repeated 613 times, followed by the chorus, sung endlessly)
Chorus: HEY HEY HEY HEY, OYOYOYOYOOOOOOOOOY!
HEY HEY HEY HEY, OYOYOYOYOOOOOOOOOY!